Our school was quite large and contained more than a few mischievous pupils. It was impossible for all teaching staff to know everyone's name, and so, when caught running in the corridor and being pressed for my name, it was only self preservation that made me say "Kevin, Sir". This, of course, only made my troubled waters run deeper, and is a lesson that I have carried with me to this very day. I also like to think that I helped to make Kevin the man he is today. These days I only ever tell the truth, life is a lot easier that way.

Obviously not everybody has learned that lesson. The way the internet works has ensured that it's all too easy to send email, as if it has been sent by someone else. Spam seems to have been with us forever and shows no sign of losing its popularity. Nothing irritates me more than getting a ‘Non Delivery' report in my email informing me the messages I sent at 3am could not be delivered. As far as I can recollect, I was snuggled up in bed at that time of night. This is obviously someone using my good name to send out their rubbish to a few thousand unsuspecting recipients.

Now, these people who are sending this email are trying to sell something, beg something, and often steal something. The service they are trying to push is of such low quality, that they do not want any real contact with you. Instead they want you to go to a web site and click - and get fleeced! As a marketing strategy it seems more than a little flawed. But, in the process of blanketing the country with digital rubbish, there is a real chance that my own email address or mail server gets blacklisted, resulting in problems when I send my own, legitimate email.

Sometimes it's difficult not to take things personally. But, if there is little that can be done, there is often no point in getting upset. Spam, it seems, is a fact of the internet and, if we want to enjoy its myriad benefits, then we must bear the other. So now, when I am interrupted by the beep of a meaningless email arriving, I just consider it to be Kevin's revenge. It can only be what I deserve!